Blahness

I still have no motivation. I feel like I'm on the edge barely holding on. I know that in order to help myself, i need to reach out more, and put myself out there. However, I don't want too. I don't see the point in reaching out when I know I will always be rejected. I have always felt like I don't belong. I feel like I'm in a corner, while others are fitting in. I feel like a stranger looking in. I don't know where I go from here. Its not fair to me, what I do...but I cant see to stop this madness. Where do I start?